Theyre not all they are cracked up to be.
We all of us have our little fantasy's, some are realistic, some are perhaps best left in the dark recesses of the brain.
One of mine was - to have a virgin.
I dont really know what I thought would happen in reality - the fantasy was bound to be better.
There he was, trembling at the end of the bed like a little lost fawn, quite literally a delicate little flower. I guess the trembling was kind of cute although not really a promising sign of fun filled frolicks.
I forgot to mention he had hidden in the toilet for half an hour before hand, trembling, trying to convince himself HE COULD DO THIS, RARRRR!
This was not as I had envisaged.
When he eventually climbed in to bed I was deeply engrossed in a movie. There he lay, trembling, the whole bed shaking. I turn to him. 'You can touch me you know' I smiled, expecting gentle caresses before the commencement of intimate exploration. No chance there. Straight for the goods, no hesitation.
This was going terribly wrong, this is not how it was meant to be!
Although to be fair to the man he had never partaked of such sin before. Nonetheless, the fantasy was far more fun.
The actual love making was short and, well, short. Three seconds would be generous. Still, there was a chance, recovery was quick and the trembling subsided. Part two also lasted three seconds.
I demanded a coffee and returned to movie.
Fantasies really should remain fantasies.